Sorry
for the lack of blogs, but unfortunately for me I have fallen into a stale
routine. Being that it is pouring
buckets of snow since my move, I have yet to really move everything into the
new place. I feel like I'm paying
to be a squatter, but whatever.
(Only I would fucking pay to be a squatter). That and being that I am officially old, and have my own
place, I don’t go out as much.
Which is good on 2 accounts.
1. I am saving more money
for rent/food/booze here at the Double Decker (new name for the place… I'll get
into that in a few). And 2. My liver isn’t shriveling into a prune
nearly as much.
Reg
and I have dubbed the apartment building here the Double Decker, being that she
is upstairs and I am downstairs and it’s just our two apartments. Ergo, Double Decker. It’s kinda awesome. Kinda. Kinda all the time awesome. Obviously.
Not
to mention, I have a frequent guest to the Lower Half of the Decker. This whole thing with Mase has gotten
to be a little more interesting than I thought it could have been. He stays a few nights a week, and we
stay up into the wee hours of the morning listening to music (cause I don’t
have a TV, and probably wont get one because I am a cheap bitch and I don’t
really watch it anyways), and chatting and making fun of people. Which usually ends up in silent,
stomach pain-type laughter. We
don’t want to wake up Reg and NITSI!
The
other night I was sitting here alone, (which is interesting after living with
someone, whether it be a boyfriend or a friend for the last 10 years) and I was
playing this stupid fucking game called Candy Crush (thanks to Finny for that
one) that I am obsessed with on a level that should be illegal, when I get a
text from Mase.
“What
up”
“Home. Probably going to die. You?”
“At
a friend house. Whats wrong?”
“Just
haven’t felt well. Kids at work
are all sick.”
“That
sucks.”
“Ugh,
I know.”
“If
I get back at a decent hour do you want to hang out?”
“If
ya wanna. I probably wont be good
company.”
“I'll
call you if its not too late. Hope
you feel better.”
So
I am laying in bed now watching Johnny Depp movies and trying to find a
comfortable position to lay in because my stomach was punching me from the
inside. It was like there was a
creature in there trying to get out and it was killing me in the process. So I am laying, and dying, and my phone
goes off…
“Hey,
just asking… Do you want me to back off and not talk to you as much? Be honest.”
WOAH! I don’t know how to interpret this
one. I mean its one of two things
right? Either he is getting sick
of me and wants me to play it cool by saying, “nooooo! Of course not!” so he can be the cool
one in the end that says, ‘all right, well I need space!’ or he wants to know
if I am sick of him, and he wants to learn the answer by asking me this because
I would be honest. This whole time
I was wondering if I was the one bothering him, so of course I come back with
this…
“No,
what makes you ask this?”
I
am a tricky fucker. Now I have him
where I want him. I have reversed
the tables on him! Muahahaha. Now he can either be honest in saying,
“I think we hang out to much so I want to not do that,” or he can say, “ya
know, I guess I dig ya, so its cool.
Just wondering.” But
instead his answer is this…
“Just
have to ask. I don’t wanna make
shit weird.”
Don’t
wanna make shit weird?! Don’t
wanna make shit weird. Dude, by
playing ring around the Rosie, your making shit weird. Just let it be what it is! Don’t ask me questions dude! I don’t like playing games. Fuck. Snuggle.
Sleep. Waken. Bye. That’s an ideal thing right? I mean, I don’t want a relationship and I have come to that
conclusion a while ago. I don’t
think I need one man in my life when I could have many men and opt for one to
poke holes in condoms with.
“Well,
it’s not weird.”
“I
hope not. I just want to be open
and honest with shit and I don’t wanna overstep any boundaries.”
I
didn’t think we had any boundaries.
But I guess I was mistaken.
He is a boundary kind of guy with his fuck buddies. Whatever. I, apparently, don’t give enough of a shit to build boundary
walls.
“Your
not. I would tell you.”
“So
you wanna hang then?”
I
say, “Its up to you really. I am
boring company tonight.”
“I
would rather be bored with you than bored alone.”
“Well
come on over then.”
Now,
I don’t know about you guys… Why build these weird boundary walls then say he
wants to be bored with me instead of being bored alone? I don’t know. Sometimes I think its too hard being me. I mean, I am just that awesome. Men are like putty in my artsy fartsy
little hands. I am a regular
fucking sculptor.
He
comes over and true to my word I am in bed and watching Johnny Depp and he
comes in and goes to sleep next to me.
I’m OK with it. At least I
woke up next to someone on Valentines Day instead of being completely
alone. (Which was weird as
well. First one in 6 years I was
alone for. But I made up for it by
eating red velvet cupcakes and dark chocolate cake with marble icing and
silently crying into a big iced coffee.
Moving on).
Whatever,
I go to work and I come home. I
called my friend Slim to come over for a little bit because she is moving to
Florida and I wont see her for a long time. Were sitting around and bull shitting for a few hours and I
was telling her about Mase. She
says, “OMG! I love him! Tell him to come over!”
Mase
comes over and were all sitting around drinking these shitty little Bud Lime
margarita things. Clearly a summer
drink because drinking them in an apartment on a cold winter night isn’t as
refreshing as drinking them while floating in a mini pool on a deck at a
squatter house. Just saying.
Slim
leaves and Mase and I stay up drinking these little fucking things that cause
instant heartburn and a sugar rush.
Then we go to bed. I throw
on a movie and I am half in the bag because of the margaritas and I lay
down. He lays down next to me and
grabs me. I’m not gonna lie… I
LOVE being man handled. Throw me
around like a rag doll and I am a happy human being.
In
my sugar high stupor I reach down into my goody drawer, which he wasn’t aware
existed until last night, and I pulled out some vanilla flavored cream. I am laughing at myself just
reiterating this because it’s hysterical.
He is looking at me like I am a whack job and I am looking at him like,
“I'm just gonna eat ya!” Needless to say, he liked the cream.
I
then realized that I have done a complete 180 and I don’t give a fuck what
anyone thinks about me. I am
completely comfortable being naked around him. For Christ’s sake, I pulled out sex cream! I am an awesome fucking
individual. I have body creams and
lubricating lotions and things that go buzzzz in the night. Not to mention, I am not afraid to play
with them! HA HA! (Malicious laughter inserted here).
I
go to the bathroom when I am done with him, I had rubbed him down because it’s
an edible lotion, and I wash myself a bit then I go back to bed. I wake up in the morning to my hand
under my head and a smell of vanilla in my nostrils. ‘What the fuck did I do last night?’ was my first thought.
Then
I look over and see Mase kind of waking up, and through my contact-less eyeballs
I can see my vanilla Lickity Stiff sitting on the nightstand. Mentally I put my hands in my head and
shook really hard. I am a dirty whoremonger!
He
is going to leave and as is now his custom he gives me hugs and kisses and goes
on his way. Typically after doing
something silly like pulling my pants down and giggling, or pinching my butt,
or saying something snarky, he kisses me and leaves. I like the banter in the morning. It really starts the day out right.
(I
just reread the blog before publishing it. I realized something.
The title isn’t meant to be spooge or anything. It’s the actual cream I used!
HAHA! Eh, I guess either idea
works really!)